“No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.”

—Taoist proverb

The extraordinary connection between self-reflection and performance is well-known and well-documented. For example, in their Harvard Business Review article “Don’t Underestimate the Power of Self-Reflection,” James R. Bailey and Scheherazade Rehman show that the “habit of reflection can separate extraordinary professionals from mediocre ones. We would go so far as to argue that it’s the foundation that all other soft skills grow from.”

Luckily for me, I’ve been doing self-reflection since early childhood. At dinner, as we all sat around the kitchen table, we had a regular ritual. Everyone reflected on their day. We turned our dinner-table sharings into dinner-table learning moments. Each of us reflected on–and talked about–what had happened during the day and what impact it had on us. 

My dad’s coal-mining reflections always impressed me the most. His pay was based on how many coal cars he loaded each day, shovel by shovel, working in seams of coal sometimes no higher than 40 inches. He and his fellow coal miners shoveled coal while lying on their backs or kneeling on their knees. Generally, my dad was pleased by what he accomplished–he actually enjoyed being a coal miner. But since his pay and his family’s livelihood depended on how many coal cars he loaded, he would strategize what he might do to load one more car the next day. It was a succession of what-ifs. The next day, he’d let us know whether his strategy had worked.

Looking back, I realize that day after day, my dad was measuring his performance against his plan. Looking back, I realize that we were all doing the same thing as we gathered around our kitchen table and shared thoughtful, deliberate, and sometimes courageous self-reflections.

● Self-reflection.

● Measuring performance against plan.

I have always done that, willingly and enthusiastically throughout my careers. During the years that I taught at Laurel Ridge Community College (formerly Lord Fairfax Community College; 1999-2022), I spent the better part of December standing still, reflecting on my year of teaching that had just ended. I turned my self-reflections into my annual self-evaluation, complete with supporting documentation. Generally, those self-evaluations were longer than 150 pages, covering accomplishments as well as areas that I wanted to work on and explore during the next year. They meant so much to me that I had them bound in leather. Most of the time, those self-evaluations weren’t required, and even when they were, the requirement was never as great as the distance that I went. It was my ongoing way of ensuring that I measured my performance against my plan.

In January of this year, I started reinventing myself. Now, with seven months behind me, I’m standing still long enough to reflect and to share my self-reflections with you.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS

1. Book Publications

I am really proud that I’ve had two books published since January. One was published in April: In Bed: My Year of Foolin’ Around.

The second, a scholarly work, was published in May: Green Mountain Stories. Mary E. Wilkins Freeman. Introduction and Critical Commentary by Brent L. Kendrick.

Obviously, I had been working on both books long before I started my reinvention. Books don’t spring into existence overnight. At the same time, seeing two books through the publication process brought me great joy.

On reflection, however, I wish that I had allowed more time between the two books. I had to do far more heavy lifting, getting them published than I ever expected. I don’t think that I will ever again have two books in the publication hopper at the same time.

2. Book Launches

Without a blush of shame, I did my own launch of In Bed: My Year of Foolin’ Around. I did it right here in my blog, in my May 8 post: Just Published. In Bed: My Year of Foolin’ Around.

The next week, I cast shame aside once again and promoted my Green Mountain Stories: My Forthcoming Book Will Anchor Mary E. Wilkins Freeman to Vermont, Now and Forever.

Fortunately, Green Mountain Stories had two launches sponsored by other people. The first was by the book’s publisher, Onion River Press: Brent Kendrick. Book Launch Celebration. The second book launch took place in Brattleboro, Vermont, where Freeman began her acclaimed literary career: Green Mountain Stories. Live at the Library.

3. Library Presentation

On Sunday, July 9, I was the guest speaker at the New Market Area Library (New Market, VA). My topic? Reinvention and my own attempts to begin new “chapters” in my life. 

I targeted my presentation toward anyone considering a new beginning, aspiring writers, and lovers of short stories.

CHALLENGES

1. Giving Myself Permission to Chill.

I have an incredibly strong work ethic, which has always kept me hard at work doing something. It brings me great joy.

Even though I have set up my own work schedule, I have discovered that I have more time now to just chill. I’m not talking about meditation. I’ve done that forever. I’m talking about curling up with a book for the entire day. I did just that last week when I re-read (for the fifth time) George Saunders’ Lincoln in the Bardo. It was a luxurious experience, but from time to time, I had to chase away the thought that I should be up and about doing something.

It will take me some time, but I’m working on chilling.

2. Reassessing My Structure.

This challenge is related closely to my first one. I’m a laid-back, go-with-the-flow guy. Right? Well, I am. However, I like my days to be structured. Actually, that’s an understatement. I like–and live–a regimented existence. I always have. If I shared my day-planner–(Don’t ask; I won’t share.) –you would discover that all the timeslots are full, from sunup to sundown.

These days, I’m discovering that I can accomplish everything that I want to accomplish in a day and still have some free time slots for me. Mine. All mine. This is a new sensation for me, and I like it. I had no idea before that 30 minutes here and there could expand into such vastly soft and silky luxuriousness.

ONGOING AND UPCOMING PROJECTS

1. Weekly Blog Posts.

I never dreamt how important my weekly blog posts would become to me. In the midst of whatever might be going on, writing my posts anchors me. They are essential components of who I am and of who I am yet to become.

2. Dolly: Life and Letters of Mary E. Wilkins Freeman.

My goodness. You know you’re in love when the love grows richer over time. My love affair with Mary E. Wilkins Freeman is now in its fifth decade.

My current project has as its foundation my The Infant Sphinx: The Collected Letters of Mary E. Wilkins Freeman (Scarecrow, 1985), praised by The Journal of Modern Literature as “the most complete record to date of Freeman’s life as writer and woman.” 

Since that publication, more letters have surfaced. Rather than simply updating The Infant Sphinx, I am working on a two-volume book: Dolly: Life and Letters of Mary E. Wilkins Freeman. Vol. 1: The New England Years (1852-1901). Vol II: The New Jersey Years (1902-1930).

This is a major scholarly work will take several more years. I am hopeful that Volume I will be published by the end of 2024 or the beginning of 2025.

3. Edinburg Ole Time Festival Authors Tent.

Look for me on September 16 and 17 in the lineup with other local authors. If you live in the area, please stop by not only to say “Hi” but also to support the festival.

4. The Humourist Essays.

This blog had its birth when I was a Chancellor’s Professor (2012-2014). My project focused on a remarkable collection of Colonial American essays, songs, poems, and advertisements published pseudonymously under the name of “The Humourist” in the South Carolina Gazette during 1753-1754. The Encyclopedia of the Essay (ed. Tracy Chevalier, 1997) places “The Humourist” essays in the tradition of Samuel Johnson’s Rambler essays and observes that they are the only “full-fledged literary” works to have appeared in the South Carolina Gazette. J. A. Leo Lemay (du Pont Winterthur Professor of English at the University of Delaware) noted in A Bibliographical Guide to the Study of Southern Literature (1969) that the essays should be edited, published, and the author identified.

I completed all of those tasks. My plan is to start sending the completed manuscript to publishers by the end of September, with an eye toward publication in January/February2024.

ACCOUNTABILITY PARTNERS

I’m really glad that I’m continuing my decades-old practice of regularly reflecting on my performance. This time, though, is singularly different. I’m sharing my self-reflections with you. I like that. Actually, I like that a lot. By sharing my plans with you, I am, of course, holding myself accountable to readers from around the world. The ramifications are far-reaching. Equally important, by sharing my plans with you, you become my virtual accountability partners. You can count on me, and I know that I can count on you!